Are you fostering a child or recently become an adoptive parent? Fostering and adoption is one of the most rewarding roles you could play in your life and gives you the ability to transform a child’s life and give them the love and stability they deserve. However, as with many children, there will be times when we have to deal with difficult behaviour. Some children who go into the care system have experienced traumatic experiences or come from war-torn countries which have resulted in them being unable to properly express themselves.
For many children who go into care, they may have experienced being neglected by their birth parents, witnessing domestic or mental abuse or may have never had the chance to gain the love they deserve from their birth parents. It is for this reason that any parent of a foster or adoptive child must be patient and compassionate and learn how best to deal with difficult behaviour. Here are five ways that you can overcome difficult behaviour and provide the stability a child needs in life.
- Remain calm and distract
There are times when children may throw a tantrum or express undesirable behaviour. At this time make sure to remain calm and see if you can distract them by not focusing on the undesired behaviour.
- Set a good example
Become a role model to your child by expressing the values of honesty, integrity and trustworthiness. This will show your child that you care about their needs and you are there to listen to them and take them seriously whilst imparting values that can benefit them holistically.
- Consistency is key
Try to develop consistency by responding in a similar way to events and ensuring that your child feels secure and loved. Developing a consistent routine with your child will help them throughout the day and ensure that they feel supported and cared for.
- Build their self confidence
Many children exhibiting difficult behaviour may have other issues and they may be suffering with low self esteem. Make sure to praise your child when it is due and ensure that you build up their confidence by encouraging them with their talents and goals.
- Try not to panic
Lastly, it is important to try your best not to panic when a child expresses difficult behaviour but instead keep a calm and steady approach to tackling their needs by showing that you are there for them. It is important to identify your own feelings and it may help to take a few deep breaths or take yourself out of the situation temporarily by changing rooms until they have calmed down if the situation is very challenging.
Remember that all parents go through highs and lows in bringing up their children and it is important to be able to know how to react and how to deal with difficult behaviour. Once you have a clear idea of how you are going to react, things will become a lot more easier in dealing with any challenges that present.
